With detailed questionnaires, Martin Seligman was able to study the pursuit of happiness. He asked, "what makes people happy?" Seligman found that there are 3 levels of happiness: The Pleasant Life, The Good Life, and The Meaningful Life. Those who experienced the highest level of well-being were living The Meaningful Life.
The Meaningful Life “springs from finding ways to
make the world a better place” (Duncan & Goddard, p. 159), or in other words, using your abilities
to serve others!
One great thing about service is that there are so many
options. Each of us can find something that perfectly suits us. From feeding
the homeless and visiting the elderly to paying for the car behind you in the
drive thru and giving out free hugs. The options and opportunities are endless!
Enjoy more of The Meaningful Life in your marriage as you
perform some service together. To spark ideas, use this list of suggestions: Community Service Project Ideas.
Not only does it “feel good to do good [but] it feels good
to witness acts of goodness” (Duncan & Goddard, p. 159). This is the phenomenon called “elevation”
which means when we witness an act of charity or gratitude, "we are deeply
impressed with it's beauty and feel a strong desire in ourselves of doing charitable and grateful acts also" (Duncan & Goddard, p. 159).
We all have witnessed these type of acts in books, movies,
or in person. Jonathan Haidt said, “Elevation is elicited by acts of virtue or
moral beauty; it causes warm, open feelings in the chest; and it motivates
people to behave more virtuously themselves” (Duncan & Goddard, p. 159).
Performing service not only lifts your mood but as you serve your spouse you will find a greater love, patience, and sensitivity in your marriage. If you want a strong marriage, serve each other.
Decide on what to do for your service date and before you
start, watch a few of these videos to be inspired or “elevated!”
Source: Duncan, S. F., & Goddard, H. W., (2011). Family life education: Principles and practices for effective outreach. Thousand Oaks, CA. Sage Publications, Inc.
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